Thursday, June 23, 2016

Messes and living

As I get older, I can tell that messes are just a part of life. My eldest children went to visit family for a week and my house is still clean. I have a 3 year old that has toys all over the floor and the dog has pulled all of the fluff out of it's chew toy.

But it's not dirty. It's just life clutter.

When my children are grown and gone there won't be the life clutter of toys and art mess.

I feel stress and guilt when the house is messy.

Anxiety keeps me from enjoying the mess.

When my children are grown the mess will be gone and so will the anxiety and stress in some respects.

But the guilt will join a new feeling: loneliness.

So may we embrace and accept that our houses will stay messy as long as we have people in them- living- not crippled in fear of making messes.

 Let's not scold for messes.

Take a deep breath. If they make a mess what lesson might they learn? It takes patience for us to slowly guide and teach our children how to clean. It won't happen over night. And the standard of clean that we can provide will be less when we delegate to them. We have to find peace in that. Their sub-par help will be missed one day. It's our job to teach them. Perhaps with our guidance they will stop the cycle of guilt and shame associated with making the normal messes that come with living. Perhaps a new generation of artists and creators will come from us and the obsession with maintaining the status quo will be a thing of the past. Perhaps the future will be filled with less mental anguish and more peace and beauty. We can dream right?

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