Yay!

Last year I almost got hit by a car on my birthday. This year I need to go to work early, so I know the traffic will be light. Phew!
I get to be a judge at a Toastmaster's contest for Tall Tales speeches. I know my cubicle is all decorated and I have a yummy treat with my name on it. I'm glad that I have the next 5 days off. It will be nice to be away from work for a little while. Especially since we get to go to Three Falls Cove! Yay! Today is going to be a great day.

Pat on the back

Work had an interesting feel to it today. We were told to make containers of some sort at the beginning of August. We had small squares of paper where we would write something nice about a co-worker and place it in their respective box. I made my box out of a tissue box and played with decoupage.

Well then today, we got an email telling us that we had until 5:00 today to finish with our "pats-on-the-back". People all over the floor were stuffing papers into everyone's boxes all day long. Then there's the feeling that someone put a note in your box and you feel obligated to return the favor. Thankfully, everyone that put a note in my box (that I saw) had one from me already in theirs. I got the feeling right away that it was about how many you gave, as opposed to how many got the most. I'll hopefully know for sure tomorrow (as we were not allowed to look at the notes all month long.)

It was a fun feeling, kind of like a holiday... even though it's just bits of paper and ink. I look forward to seeing the notes finally.

I remembered we did something similar to this a couple years ago, but it kind of backfired. Back then they said that it had to be work only related and job specific. Well only a few team leads got the bulk of the praise. Us newbies rarely helped anyone, but needed all the help. They didn't keep it so strict this time and it worked out much better. I think everyone got SOMETHING in their boxes this time.

Stay tuned for more...

HOT AND COLD

Wow. What an experience. Leelee took me to the hospital this morning for two tests.

The CT Angiogram was a "wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am" experience. They gave me an IV and then I laid down. The donut that goes around you rotates really really fast. It was a strange feeling. Then they quickly (and I mean quickly) inject this dye that makes you feel like you have an instant fever. That made me feel really yucky. Then I got the chills. Talk about roller coaster. Then I just stayed prone for about 5 minutes until the feeling wore off. The whole shabang took about 10 minutes from start to finish. I hurt and had pins and needles all over. Thankfully they had a wheelchair, so I wheeled to the waiting room for the second test. (At the very end my brain felt really really cold. Weird huh?)

The MRI was uneventful, but long. 45 minutes for one test. It was the lumbar region of my spine. The tech lady gave me a nice warm blanket and I got all cozy in the 7 foot long MRI machine. For those of us that hate confined spaces, I just recommend closing your eyes. If you can't see how tight the space is, it's better. I day dreamed about Tzipi's Barbie Birthday party, Pancakes with lots of butter and syrup, a shopping spree with actual money, and Three Falls Cove (not necessarily in that order). I had to fight panic once maybe twice. The muscle spasms forced me to stay a bit longer because I twitched during one of the pictures. So the tech had to redo the last picture which added 4 minutes to the thing.

I see an Ophthalmologist on the 1st of September. Hopefully I'll be able to get my eye allergy medicine prescription while I'm there because my eyes are so itchy. I'm going to check on my right eye which has possible retinal tearing.

There are times (like on the CAT SCAN bed) when I just want to run away from all of this and quit trying to solve this dang mystery, but I can't. I have to have my thyroid cared for, I need to have my back cared for, and I can't afford to lose the ability to walk. The pain I can handle. But I have to take care of my family.

At least I have my birthday to look forward to, Three Falls cove, my 10th anniversary, and Sukkot! This lady was 32 at the time of this picture.  I don't know her name. She had a whole litter of kids, but lived during the "dust bowl days". She was blessed with many children, but she had a hard life. I have it easy. I had a vacation day that I could take, so I could mentally recuperate from this medical stuff. She never had that. She never had a tech help her walk or lay a warm, clean blanket on her. I must keep my mind on the things that really matter. I wish I could go back in time and help her take care of that little one so she could take a nap.

I love my family so very much. Without you I have no idea where I would be. Thank you!

Something fun!

I so rarely get to shop at Target that it's quite a treat. I got to go run an errand and it was so much fun. Take joy in the little things!

Update on stuff

 

I went to the neurologist yesterday. Not fun. She did tell me that they found two growths on my thyroid during the ultrasound. I have an appointment with Dr. Usala on September 22nd. 

Then she went on to say that she doesn't know what is causing my problems. She wants to increase my anxiety medicine and give me a sleeping pill. After trying that for a month, she'll send me to Dallas. 

I was not happy. I feel like she's prolonging the pain and passing the buck. But I called my general practitioner and I'm going to see him today at 2:00. I just need someone to talk to about all of this and I need him to fill out my intermittent leave paperwork so I can keep my job. I'm 1 sick day away from getting fired. Plus I'm going to ask him for some pain help. I asked the neurologist for a TENS unit and she said she didn't see why I would need it. How is losing the ability to walk and not being able to feel my spine, stress related? Sure I'll say that the headaches could be stress related, but they aren't normal headaches. They are at the base of my skull and go down my neck and my eyeballs hurt and blinking hurts. I cried a lot yesterday. It's all quite a bit to take in.

Then my neurosurgeon called. I have a CT Angiogram on my neck and brain as well as another spinal MRI on Monday August 30th. He seems to think this is vascular. So I took a vacation day since I have no idea how I'll feel after the angio. 

I see a rheumatologist on the 15th of September.

I spoke with my very good friend at work. She survived the worst type of Thyroid cancer and she lives daily with RA. She explained that I need to find a new normal. I can't keep wishing for a pill to make everything better. I need to ask for help. I need to be my own advocate. I need to stand up for myself. She had numerous doctors tell her that it was all in her head, before finding an ENT that believed it was more than stress and found the cancer.

They have found things. The spinal disorder and the growths on my thyroid. I was perfectly healthy until I had shingles. So I'm not crazy. Yes, my life is stressful even without the health issues, but walking with a cane at 31 just doesn't make sense.

So this is the news. I feel like I'm playing musical specialists. 

SIDE NOTE: The Barbie picture just makes me happy.

We love you!

 

We love these two boys. They mean the world to us. I'm trusting that I will get to see them today and this horrible nightmare will be over.

First Day of School 2010 Wolflin Elementary

Mrs. Camp Third Grade

Mrs. Houston Pre-K

Tzipi goes to afternoon class. From 12 to 3. She drove her father crazy all morning. Is it time yet, now? How about now? Can we go now? I'm glad I was at work and missed it.

They both really like their teachers. Zee said that they don't have enough breaks and the students have to be quiet all the time (oh the horror!)

They were both ready for school. I pray that they learn good lessons and show a good example of Torah.

I am very proud of both of my smiley beautiful children!

Hans

 

When things are ruff and you need to be "in the now", hug Hans. He will kiss you and hug you and tell you that everything is OK right now. Don't think about yesterday or tomorrow. Don't worry about bills or drama or pain. Just know that right now, you are in the middle of a wonderful puppy love session and that is all that matters. 

Thank you for sharing him, Leelee and Kevin! Love you!

This is my new focus...to have Hans moments throughout my day!

Need a giggle? I did... Just "Google:Images": funny signs.

Such a sad, mad, bad day...

Well an update: Saw the neurosurgeon today. It was frustrating. Waiting and waiting and waiting just to be told that the spinal disorder I have isn't causing my symptoms. I burst out crying right then and there. 

(poor doctor)

  6 months of agony and he doesn't know what is wrong. So he said that we'd do a CT Angiogram of my neck and brain to see if the vessels are allowing blood to flow properly. Maybe it's vascular. Maybe it's neurological. It's certainly not the syringomyelia. It's too minimal to be causing all the trouble. When I saw the MRI for myself, I could tell. It's like a small soda straw. Not like the huge masses on the websites. The neurosurgeon said that I would need to have an MRI every six months to keep checking to make sure the syrinx doesn't get bigger. (This isn't my MRI... just kind of looks like it.)

So I will get a referral to the hospital for the CT scan (really not looking forward to that at all) and another Spinal MRI. I will hear from my neurologist on Thursday about my Thyroid ultra sound and I guess she'll talk to me about my next steps. I'm hoping she'll give me an RX for a TENS machine. I'd like to at least try using it and see if it helps with the pain. The neurosurgeon DID fill out the paperwork so I can have a handicap placard. YAY for not having to walk a mile to work!!! Woohoo! But I've been crying all day. I expect way too much out of life. I get let down way too often. No one said life would be easy, but golly I've had my share of stuff. I was hoping my adult life would be "normal". I'm still waiting...

Peaceful

Please, please, please!!!

http://www.foodnetwork.com/the-next-food-network-star/index.html

 You all know how much I love Indian food. I don't have cable or satellite TV, but I love going to the Food Network website and watching videos. I've been hoping for a long time that they would bring a chef that would feed my love for the Spicier things in life. My timing could not have been better. They are at the finale for "The Next Food Network Star" (down to 3) and guess who is the crowd favorite? A sweet lady named Aarti Sequeira from Dubai. YAY! She has the cutest website called "Aarti Paarti" and she mixes Indian and American cuisine. I'm so happy. I voted 10 times today and she has the most votes. I soooooo hope she wins. She already has an internet show, so she knows how to entertain an audience. Woohoo! I just need some buttermilk now so I can make her BAKED Samosas. Yum! I don't know when the actual show airs, so if you find out that she wins, please post on Facebook! Thank you!

http://www.aartipaarti.com/

Happy Birthday Sweetheart!

 

I added this picture because this has always been Avi's favorite holiday. He likes it even more than birthdays. Sukkot is only a few weeks away!

Avi, Happy birthday love. I hope this year gets better. You have been a dear and I know this hasn't been a great year, but having you by my side makes it all worth while. May the best of this year be the worst of next year! To many many more... the wife.

To Azariah...

 

I tried so hard to stay awake. I had the phone right next to my head. I am so sorry I missed your call. I love you so much. Hopefully things will be quiet and I can call you this morning. Have a great day and don't worry about home, we miss you and we love you and we want you to have a great time at Grandpa and Grandma's house.

Back in the Saddle again...

 

That's right folks... after a rough night's sleep and the alarm failing to go off and being awakened by my lovely husband, I got ready in a daze and made it off to work. I've been in a fog all day, but I got work done. I even went to the bank to get some bank stuff done. Sore, tired, but glad to be back to 'normal'.

Tomorrow after work I go to the hospital for the ultra sound on my neck. I'm sure it will be quick and I'll get to go home earlier than normal on a Tuesday. 

I'm listening to a very pleasant book. "An Irish Country Village" by Patrick Taylor. It's like "All Creatures Great and Small", only it's with people instead of animals. I'm enjoying it very much. I didn't want to leave my desk for dread of missing anything in this book. Like Ireland meets Grey's Anatomy or Boston MED.

It pays to go to the best!

 

I was frustrated with my dentist trying to fix all the problems in my mouth and not really know much about my mouth. Thankfully, I found someone who really knows a cleft palate when they see one. Amarillo Oral and Maxiofacial Center was great. I had surgery in their office, in a big long hall with lots of rooms. I didn't feel a thing. They were sweet and extremely knowledgeable. Everything was state of the art.  Dr. Smith and Dr. Graves were wonderful. I would highly recommend them to anyone who has to have a procedure that is out of the ordinary. 

I'm still in pain and it hurts to talk, but I know it's going to be great once everything heals. I'm glad I have 4 days to get over this so I can go back to work. Thank God for sick days. This isn't how I expected to use them, but I'm glad I had them. 

As you could probably guess, I'm bored again. Stuck in my room trying to stay absolutely still. I'm hoping that I feel better tomorrow so I can make a few cards while I'm lying in bed. We'll see.

If you know of something fun I can watch or do on the internet, please let me know. 

Bored and Sore in Amarillo.

When it rains it pours...

 

Well, guess what I get to do tomorrow? Have my wisdom teeth taken out. I'm in so much pain, even WITH two Lortab in my system, that I don't have much choice in the matter. So pray for me tomorrow at 9:00. I will be having two very annoying teeth removed. I have to have it done. Do I want to have surgery tomorrow? No. But it's either that or hire a hitman to kill me. Just kidding... The pain truly is THAT bad though.

Infinitesimal...

No matter how tiny I may feel, I have to remember I am in HIS hands.

I went to my neurologist today. Let's sum it up with... the answers created more questions.

When they did the MRI for my neck looking for lesions, they found a mass on/near my thyroid. I'll go in on the 10th for an ultra sound to see if it really is a mass. And maybe it's something to worry about.

Then my thoracic spinal MRI showed spinal fluid cavity. I go to a neurosurgeon for a diagnosis or more tests on the 10th too. For liability purposes my neurologist wouldn't/couldn't answer any of my questions regarding the cavity. Google is way too much power in the hands of the lay person. Let's just say, I would have been happier with a diagnosis of MS.  Pretty lame huh?

I would say I'm staying strong and positive, but that would be a big fat lie. I want to crawl in bed for a few days and cry. Not that it would make it better. It just feels like the normal thing to do. I'm tired of being tough. I'm tired of being strong.

I did do the b-12 shot and didn't feel a thing. That's a high note on an otherwise crappy day.

PS. I just wish I was half as cute as that little critter in the above picture. Oh well.

Life on Sunday...

 As a kid, I never dared say this phrase. As an adult and in the current state of things, I'm so bored. I already spent all my energy trying to find the best deal for school supplies. Why does a third grader need a 14 dollar 3" 3 ring binder? Especially when I could buy 3 1" binders for 50 cents! Arrrggghhhh.And last year, when I scrimped on a cheapo binder, it fell apart and Zee never told me till school was over. I did get 9 cent pencils and 19 cent highlighters. Office Depot had some good sales, but the best deals of the day were at Walgreens. I'm sure Walmart has some good things, but I don't shop there unless it's before 8am. I still need way more than I'd like to admit, but I'm half-way there. Two kids in school! ARG!

I go to Dr. Saulog's tomorrow and hopefully find out what all the tests say. I should start my B-12 shots tomorrow too.

My friend Corina came over and worked so hard on my house. It's so nice. I still have to work on my own room, but considering how much work we did on the rest of the house, I'm thrilled. I can't thank her enough.

Well, I guess I will find something lame to watch on Hulu.

A good friend...

 

 My friend Corina came up to me and said she needed to ask me something, so could I walk with her to the break room. I did. She was all serious and stuff. She said," I was debating whether I should ask you or if I should ask Avi". She knows how difficult it is to get housework done (especially the deep cleaning I've needed to do for a while) when you feel so yucky. She offered to clean my house. But she wanted to make sure Avi would be OK with her being there. I figured he could take the kids somewhere and we could work on the house. I haven't heard from Avi about what his plans are, but I am just so grateful to have such an awesome friend. She is an awesome person and people don't often give her a chance. She is so special and has such a big heart. I love her so much. Thank you Corina!

Tazer anyone?

I'm sure that people who have actually been tazered, would disagree, but that is the closest way I can explain the yuckiest part of today's round of tests. The visual test was boring. I got goop in my hair, connected to a computer with wires and stared at a black and white pattern for a long time. One eye at a time.

Then the nerve test on hands and feet were like mini tazers being attached and held on for like 5 minutes. The left side wasn't too bad because that is the side I have the most difficulty with. My right side though felt every ounce of pain. I almost passed out with the right hand. They had to do each one individually. Yuck. Since the neurologist already knew about the nerve damage to my ears, I was saved the third round of the EMG. No sense in taking a test I know I'm going to fail.

The doctor called while I was napping and said that I need multiple shots of B-12 after looking at last night's blood work. I'm going to have to learn how to do this so I don't have to go to the doctor every time I need it. More than one way to get over being freaked out with needles. Take control of the needle! Avi offered to help if I can't get the hang of it. So I'll get that started on Monday when I see the neurologist.

I just found out that my Uncle in Wyoming is being tested for MS too.

The mountain is bumpy and steep, but I'm still climbing.

Why am I awake at 3am?

 

I really didn't want to wake up this early. Maybe after I blog and drink some milk, I can sneak a few more Zzzzzs. 

Well, Leelee picked me up at 7:15 on the dot and took me to the hospital. Got registered and instead of doing the labwork first, the MRIs went first. If you have never had one, practice meditation NOW. I don't like tight enclosed spaces, but I'm proud to say I didn't panic. First we did the neck and upper spine the normal way. Then we did my right eye. Then the MRI tech gave me a shot of dye and we did the eye again, the neck and then the thoracic spine with contrast. There were two times that I had to focus really hard because I wanted out. Then I started singing my favorite Hebrew songs (complete with lisp since I didn't have my teeth). I'm not sure if the tech could hear me, but at that point I didn't care, I was just trying to stay calm. My left leg started to spasm while I was trying to lie very still. Not fun at all. Deep Breathing, Singing, Keeping my eyes closed, and going to a happy memory in the past; helped me get through the tight white tube of screaminess. The noise is really really loud. I liked it when it had a rhythm. I could count it and make myself happy. But when it was just loud tones, not fun.

So this morning I plan on curling my hair before I put on my hat, because they will be sticking diodes on my head and I'd rather have curls than chaos. Vain, yes... but I need a little pleasure in the middle of this situation. 

I'd be lying if I said that this isn't bothering me or affecting me. I cried for the latter part of my day at work. I've been strong up to now. Dealing with the stares and questions at work as to why I walk with a cane now, but have to park way out in Egypt. I'm just an eyesore, I guess. Or a circus act. Meet the weird girl who doesn't fit in. What's new? I can't quit living. I have to walk and I don't want to fall on my face. I have good days and bad days. Life is but a blink of an eye. Even though the days seem long, I've been through 8 surgeries of my own and waited during 14 surgeries for my son. I've lived in Wyoming, Virginia, Texas and New Mexico. I've stayed at home and made bread every Friday and worked 7 days a week when AIG went crazy. I've cried for days from loneliness at the age of 17 and I've cried without tears wanting just 1 hour alone. I've walked the Oregon trail and been to Times Square at midnight. And I'm only 31. This is just a blip. I can do this.

UPdate: Bear With Me...

Hi. I went to the Neurologist today. It pays to be a squeaky wheel. If you ask to be bumped up for any cancellations, it really does work! Rather than waiting until August 23rd, I got in today!

OK. So after being asked a million questions and answering them all, I have lab work, 3 MRIs (totaling 3 hours) on Tuesday night and a nerve test for 4 hours on Wednesday.

She poked me with a needle all over the place. I didn't feel most of it on my back or my left side. So she thinks I have a lesion on my spinal cord. I've lost some vision in my right eye. She thinks it could be MS. But we'll have some real answers after all the testing. I have a follow up with the Dr. on Monday August 2nd.

My favorite part was the salt water tank in the waiting room. The fish were playing in the sand. It was so much fun to watch. There was a white fish that hiding behind the filter. The clown fish seemed really aggressive and ornery. I've never seen tank fish play in the sand. I could watch them for hours.

He's Touching Me...

We got home from Lubbock a little while ago. The kids are wild. I don't understand the glee they get from fighting. Kittens are cute when they do it. My kids, not so much. 

I have a busy day tomorrow. I'm so sleepy. I hope to go to bed early tonight and sleep really well. Hopefully my day will go by quickly. I see Dr. Soulag at 2:00. I'm so glad that I don't have to wait until August 23rd. I know I probably won't know a lot more after tomorrow, but at least I'll be that much closer to an answer.

Just thought I'd post. Gotta get my stuff ready for tomorrow.

A Great Poem For Today...

I asked for strength and
God gave me difficulties to make me strong.

I asked for wisdom and
God gave me problems to solve.

I asked for prosperity and
God gave me brawn and brain to work.

I asked for courage and
God gave me dangers to overcome.

I asked for love and
God gave me troubled people to help...

My prayers were answered.

Fresh is good!

 

... So I come on my blog to see that my favorite place for free backgrounds is going through some changes. I tried to change my background, not so easy. I think the "cutest blog on the block" site might be under construction or something. Well, I decided to try the Blogger Designer. Let me say, I LOVE IT! So much fun! Blogger has come a long way baby! What do you think? I feel like going to an open air market today. That is why I chose this background. Get ready for some fun! Gonna change it often!

 

Being President is fun! Try it some time. Not the whole white house thing. YUCK! No, being a club president is a blast. I remember having a club when I was 9 and I was the president. It was fun way back then. Back when I was 9, it was about bossing the neighborhood kids around. Today it's about organizing and making sure that my club has everything it needs. I don't really have to DO anything. I just make sure other people are doing their job and have what they need to do their jobs. I felt all grown up today at our first Officer's Meeting during my term as president.

I do have to say that now that I reminisce about my time as club president when I was 9, that we did do some awesome things. We were the "Clean Up Crew" and we organized ourselves to ride around the neighborhood and clean things up. We had a treasurer and we would ask our Dad's for change, pool our resources and after a hard day at the park, picking up litter, we'd take our bikes to the 7-11 and buy candy and drinks for a reward! Not too bad, now that I think about it.

If I could get paid to be a Toastmaster, I'd quit my job today and do Toastmastery things all day. Give public speeches, attend meetings, write books, newsletter articles, and have a blast doing it all! There was a couple in Lubbock who were the International Presidents of Toastmasters. I wonder how they got to do it. It's only a year though. I need a gig that will last longer than a year.

Thank you!

 

Thank you Leelee and Kevin for the cane upgrade. It doesn't hurt at all and isn't the least bit stinky. 

As most of my Facebook friends know, I got my appointment for the neurologist on August the 23rd. Just a bit more waiting. 

Stinky cane

Thankfully our next door neighbor had a cane I could borrow. It's stinky. I'm hoping to make a cover for the handle so my hand doesn't smell like cigarettes. I used it yesterday, but it hurt to use it. I don't want to fall on my face, so I'm going to use it. 

The kids had a blast this weekend. Linda took Tzipi to Wonderland with Kamille, Mallory and Samantha. She had a blast. When I asked her what she did, she said she rode on chocolate rides and it rained on her. With further prodding she said that the log ride made water fall down and got her wet. She knows how much I love chocolate, so she always embellishes her stories with chocolate to make them more interesting. 

Then their babysitter, Christine, took them to Despicable Me and Toys R Us. They had so much fun and were so excited when they came home. Tzipi ran straight for my bed and told me all about her fun. Zee was talking a mile a minute and had to tell me about his favorite parts of the movie. 

Thank you so much for taking them to have fun. I really appreciate our family so much. 

I love you all. Nee

Whoever said that waiting was a game, never actually waited...

 

Not knowing sucks. It took every ounce of strength for me to stay at work yesterday. I wanted to keep my overtime. I was hurting and not really able to walk very well. I kept messing up each account I worked. I feel stupid. I had to nap at my desk during my afternoon break. 

I need to carry a lighter purse. Heck maybe I have to go back to my backpack. I "heart" my Butler purse though. I need to stop carrying so much stuff. But, I have to have my lunch box. I enjoy reading or playing my DS at break, but even that hurts now. Oh, and my Toastmaster briefcase. I made it lighter, but it's still awkward to carry. I may just have to get a larger backpack that will hold a book or two and then cram my lunch in it as well. I'll look like a dweeb, but I already stand out like a sore thumb. Hee hee hee. 

I am looking forward to a cold shower, getting dressed (not really, that's a pain too) and seeing my Toastmaster friends. I just didn't want to say, I'm looking forward to a cold shower and seeing my TM friends giving the impression that my friends will be involved in the shower somehow. LOL.

Then I'll come home and nap. Then I have no plans at all. YAY!

Where am I?

 

There was a time of reflection when I began following modesty again. I went through a time of insecurity. I feel a bit more secure in my modesty now. It's not a huge deal in the grand scheme of things, but I do think that people who worship the One Creator should be different. We shouldn't blend in. We shouldn't laugh at crude jokes. We shouldn't find the worldly things interesting. We shouldn't spend our time in vain pursuits. It is not easy to stand out. It's not comfortable. But it's right. 

I don't follow popular beliefs, but I follow the One True God. The only. There is no on but Him. What He tells us to do as a loving Father is not hard nor is it far away.

Deuteronomy 30

10. when you obey the Lord, your God, to observe His commandments and His statutes written in this Torah scroll, [and] when you return to the Lord, your God, with all your heart and with all your soul.		י. כִּי תִשְׁמַע בְּקוֹל יְ־הֹוָ־ה אֱלֹהֶיךָ לִשְׁמֹר מִצְוֹתָיו וְחֻקֹּתָיו הַכְּתוּבָה בְּסֵפֶר הַתּוֹרָה הַזֶּה כִּי תָשׁוּב אֶל יְ־הֹוָ־ה אֱלֹהֶיךָ בְּכָל לְבָבְךָ וּבְכָל נַפְשֶׁךָ:
11. For this commandment which I command you this day, is not concealed from you, nor is it far away.		יא. כִּי הַמִּצְוָה הַזֹּאת אֲשֶׁר אָנֹכִי מְצַוְּךָ הַיּוֹם לֹא נִפְלֵאת הִוא מִמְּךָ וְלֹא רְחֹקָה הִוא:
12. It is not in heaven, that you should say, "Who will go up to heaven for us and fetch it for us, to tell [it] to us, so that we can fulfill it?"		יב. לֹא בַשָּׁמַיִם הִוא לֵאמֹר מִי יַעֲלֶה לָּנוּ הַשָּׁמַיְמָה וְיִקָּחֶהָ לָּנוּ וְיַשְׁמִעֵנוּ אֹתָהּ וְנַעֲשֶׂנָּה:
13. Nor is it beyond the sea, that you should say, "Who will cross to the other side of the sea for us and fetch it for us, to tell [it] to us, so that we can fulfill it?"		יג. וְלֹא מֵעֵבֶר לַיָּם הִוא לֵאמֹר מִי יַעֲבָר לָנוּ אֶל עֵבֶר הַיָּם וְיִקָּחֶהָ לָּנוּ וְיַשְׁמִעֵנוּ אֹתָהּ וְנַעֲשֶׂנָּה:
14. Rather,[this] thing is very close to you; it is in your mouth and in your heart, so that you can fulfill it.		יד. כִּי קָרוֹב אֵלֶיךָ הַדָּבָר מְאֹד בְּפִיךָ וּבִלְבָבְךָ לַעֲשֹׂתוֹ:
15. Behold, I have set before you today life and good, and death and evil,		טו. רְאֵה נָתַתִּי לְפָנֶיךָ הַיּוֹם אֶת הַחַיִּים וְאֶת הַטּוֹב וְאֶת הַמָּוֶת וְאֶת הָרָע:
16. inasmuch as I command you this day to love the Lord, your God, to walk in His ways, and to observe His commandments, His statutes, and His ordinances, so that you will live and increase, and the Lord, your God, will bless you in the land to which you are coming to take possession of it.		טז. אֲשֶׁר אָנֹכִי מְצַוְּךָ הַיּוֹם לְאַהֲבָה אֶת יְ־הֹוָ־ה אֱלֹהֶיךָ לָלֶכֶת בִּדְרָכָיו וְלִשְׁמֹר מִצְוֹתָיו וְחֻקֹּתָיו וּמִשְׁפָּטָיו וְחָיִיתָ וְרָבִיתָ וּבֵרַכְךָ יְ־הֹוָ־ה אֱלֹהֶיךָ בָּאָרֶץ אֲשֶׁר אַתָּה בָא שָׁמָּה לְרִשְׁתָּהּ:
17. But if your heart deviates and you do not listen, and you will be drawn astray, and you will prostrate yourself to other deities and serve them,		יז. וְאִם יִפְנֶה לְבָבְךָ וְלֹא תִשְׁמָע וְנִדַּחְתָּ וְהִשְׁתַּחֲוִיתָ לֵאלֹהִים אֲחֵרִים וַעֲבַדְתָּם:
18. I declare to you this day, that you will surely perish, and that you will not live long days on the land, to which you are crossing the Jordan, to come and take possession thereof.		יח. הִגַּדְתִּי לָכֶם הַיּוֹם כִּי אָבֹד תֹּאבֵדוּן לֹא תַאֲרִיכֻן יָמִים עַל הָאֲדָמָה אֲשֶׁר אַתָּה עֹבֵר אֶת הַיַּרְדֵּן לָבֹא שָׁמָּה לְרִשְׁתָּהּ:
19. This day, I call upon the heaven and the earth as witnesses [that I have warned] you: I have set before you life and death, the blessing and the curse. You shall choose life, so that you and your offspring will live;		יט. הַעִידֹתִי בָכֶם הַיּוֹם אֶת הַשָּׁמַיִם וְאֶת הָאָרֶץ הַחַיִּים וְהַמָּוֶת נָתַתִּי לְפָנֶיךָ הַבְּרָכָה וְהַקְּלָלָה וּבָחַרְתָּ בַּחַיִּים לְמַעַן תִּחְיֶה אַתָּה וְזַרְעֶךָ:
20. To love the Lord your God, to listen to His voice, and to cleave to Him. For that is your life and the length of your days, to dwell on the land which the Lord swore to your forefathers to Abraham, to Isaac, and to Jacob to give to them.		כ. לְאַהֲבָה אֶת יְ־הֹוָ־ה אֱלֹהֶיךָ לִשְׁמֹעַ בְּקֹלוֹ וּלְדָבְקָה בוֹ כִּי הוּא חַיֶּיךָ וְאֹרֶךְ יָמֶיךָ לָשֶׁבֶת עַל הָאֲדָמָה אֲשֶׁר נִשְׁבַּע יְ־הֹוָ־ה לַאֲבֹתֶיךָ לְאַבְרָהָם לְיִצְחָק וּלְיַעֲקֹב לָתֵת לָהֶם:

UPdate

 

Well, I called my doctor again. I found out that the neurologist has been out of the country (her last name is french, so I'm imagining that she went to France and was at a bistro all month) until today and that once she gets caught up on all her work and she reads my transcript and decides whether to take me on as a patient, I'll get a call. Just thought I'd post.

Crafts

    

Tzipi and I did some card making last night. It was fun. I want to do some more today, but I'm not feeling 100%. I actually got to go shopping yesterday with the kids. It was loads of fun, but maybe I overdid it. We were only gone for an hour. Then we came home and had some fun. 

Avi and I stayed up watching a really lame movie. Two lame movies in a row (one on Friday night and one on Saturday night). It was fun making fun of them, but staying up so late was probably not the best idea. At least I get the day off today.

I'm going to take it easy today and try to get my clothes ready for the coming week.

Update

I wanted to post an update really quickly before I get ready for work.

Avi took the kids to the doctor for their annual checkups and while he was there I asked him to ask Dr. M about my MRI results. So while I was at work, the nurse called me and said, Your Brain Scan MRI came back clean. I said, That's great, except I couldn't walk on Sunday, so there is still something wrong. She said, OK let me ask Dr. M. So Dr. M gets on the phone and I explain what happened on Sunday. So then he said that I should just keep my appointment with the Neurologist. I said, I don't have an appointment with a Neurologist. They never made one because you wanted me to try Physical Therapy. He said, Oh... OK well, I'll get one for you. So that's where I am. (I still don't have an appointment.)

It was just a brain MRI. So if there's something wrong with my neck or back, we are as clueless as we were. Why they didn't just cover all the bases, I don't know. I'm just patiently waiting. If the excuse is expense, wouldn't it save my insurance more money to do one complete scan as opposed to multiple ones? Just sayin'.

I was inducted as President for Toastmasters last night. We had a good time at Pacific Rim. Golly was I tired when I got home. I had a blast at Toastmasters at lunch too. Work? Lame. Toastmasters (the real reason I can stand work.)

We babysat a friend's dog this past weekend and she brought me the most beautiful handmade scarf and brought Avi a Colorado baseball cap. How sweet was that!?

Zee and Tzip had shots yesterday. Zee has scoliosis. I'm not too freaked out, cuz my chiropractor said I have it too. I'm going to see if I can find a chiropractor that takes medicaid and maybe help him with his headaches and at the same time, encourage less back pain. Tzip is perfectly healthy and so is Zee. Nothing to worry about. Baruch Hashem!

Well, my laptop's battery is getting dangerously low, so I need to go plug her back in. Hope you all have a splendid Friday!

Clean=Stress Free

I know you all understand that when the house is a mess it's really hard to relax. I'm the same way.

I thought I'd think of something fun...
Wishes:
1. To go to Palo Duro Canyon and enjoy nature (on a cool day).
2. To have a kid-free time when I feel good to make cards and scrapbook.
3. To have individual time with each kid, where the other kid is doing something they enjoy as well.
4. To eat my mom's meatloaf, peas and mashed potatoes.
5. To get to go to the shooting range with my Hubby.
6. To hug Hans again. (and get puppy kisses all over my face).
7. To spend special time with my Mom (sans kids), Tina (with my kids, John and Baby2) and Linda (sans Kids).
8. To go to the movies with my Hubby.
9. To get the entire collection of Laurie Kings' Sherlock Holmes series in paperback.
10. A real massage. (maybe it would hurt too much, but these are wishes... we're gonna pretend it feels great!)

Everything I need, I have. But it's fun to dream about free time and extra fun.

Oh look at that! It's raining! I love rain!